Here Lies The News

Sanctimony, Karma & Butter: a delicious mix

For those unaware of the glorious world of celebrity chefs – well, even for those who are aware – you may never have heard of Paula Deen. The Texan known most for prescribing butter to cure all of society’s ills came under fire a few years ago for saying racist things… well, just being racially insensitive in general.

Before the controversy had begun, she was quite well-liked by the public and was featured on television shows a lot, like NBC’s Today show in the United States.

You can just sense the sexual tension, can’t you?

However when she was invited back to the Today show to address the accusations of racism, she was mercilessly grilled by sadistic interrogator Matt Lauer.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PL02LMD8Gw

What is ordinarily a fairly light show was often made heavy by Lauer. In an infamous interview with Tom Cruise in 2005, the two engaged in a heated debate over pharmaceuticals (among other things), and at one point in the discussion Cruise tells Lauer that he’s being “glib”.

Lauer was on top of the world. He had been riding high with his impressive career, verbally vanquishing his celebrity foes one at a time.

Until this happened.

Oh, Matt… we really looked up to you, man. Being the host of a popular show watched by millions is one thing, but he really was the moral arbiter – the beacon, if you will – for people of all creeds and walks of life to follow.

Maybe he only did it because Miley Cyrus said he was “really, definitely not sexual”. That must have been stuck in his craw for years.

But there is a silver lining to all of this, even if he allegedly exposed himself to a colleague. You see, Matt’s tenacious. He’s a fighter. He doesn’t know the meaning of the word “quit” (which I guess is why he was fired). That’s why he has announced that he WILL BE BACK!! That’s right, Lauer says “…don’t worry, I’ll be back on TV”. Despite bearing the shame of allegedly having a button under his desk that “allowed him to lock his door from the inside without getting up” like some sort of supervillain (two women claim that he harassed them by locking the door, which allowed him to make unwelcome sexual advances without being seen by the other staff) he has refused to give up on his dreams. Who cares that he was a part of the #MeToo scandals?

It’s hard to tell at this point whether or not Lauer will go back to doing what he did best: lecturing others and talking down to them from a position of lofty morality.